Singled Out In a Sermon

Saturday night I experienced one of those sermon’s where the Holy Spirit seems to suddenly focus a laser beam on my head.  Pastor Roger was preaching on overcoming inadequacy, and I was agreeing while not feeling particularly connected to the message, when I suddenly found myself without breath and completely singled out in a room filled with a thousand people.  It’s not that Pastor Roger did anything to single me out, but it was God speaking directly to me through the Word he gave my pastor.  

The specific words he spoke were “anonymity” and “flying under the radar”. 

I was raised to believe that the promises of Jesus and the presence of the Kingdom of God are for today and every day.  I believed, as a child, that God cared about the details of my life and was willing to provide guidance and direction through the Holy Spirit.  I believed that God was active and involved, even in the smallest of ways.  As a result of some life-shuddering events in my teens, I faltered.  I thought I must be wrong.  Not about Jesus and the eternal salvation that He offers; but about His peaceful presence and concern related to every area of my life.  I, somehow, accepted the lie that Jesus did not come to save specifically me.  I only had salvation because Jesus came to save the world, and I was part of the world, I thought.  This belief, salvation by default, led to acceptance of all sorts of other lies about my lack of value and worthlessness.  As a result, I’ve spent much of the last 12 years believing that I am saved, but sitting on the sidelines watching others have amazing, joyful, peaceful, active relationships with God.

I don’t mean to say that I’ve been stagnant in my relationship with the Lord.  His Holy Spirit has been calling me, beckoning me, to come into a deeper relationship with Him all those years.  Still, I struggled with believing that God actually loves me by His choice and not by default because I am a part of this world.  This process sped up dramatically in November of 2012 when the Holy Spirit called me into a deeper understanding of Christ’s love for me.  Tired of feeling not quite entirely fulfilled, I decided to jump all in.  Scared that I would be completely wrong about my new suspicion that God was in love with me, I determined myself to receive whatever He had to give me.  2013 ended up being an amazing year of experiencing God’s love in big and small ways!  I have peace, fulfillment, joy, and a depth of relationship with Him that I have not experienced since I was a child. 

Near the end of 2013, the Holy Spirit breathed the phrase “Taking new territory in 2014” into my spirit for me and my family.  We’ve already taken risks we wouldn’t have a year ago.  We’ve trusted God, and seen Him deliver, in new ways.  We’ve also said “yes!” to the Holy Spirit’s leading when before we would have ignored or rebelled.  We’ve seen God be faithful and do amazing things!  We’re choosing in this new year to say “yes!”  We’re choosing to avoid anonymity and the false sense of security that it brings.  We’re choosing to take risks and claim new territory for God’s glory and His kingdom in 2014! 

To what is God calling you?